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Home arrow Entertainment arrow Hollywood Star Stone Exiled to the Moon
Hollywood Star Stone Exiled to the Moon Print E-mail
By Bob Holness   
Tuesday, 11 April 2006
Entertainment News:  Stone to be exiled to the moon
Sharon Stone
Sony Pictures today announced that following the poor US box office performance of its latest release, Basic Instinct II, the movie's leading lady, Sharon Stone, is to be exiled to the moon.

The film - a direct sequel to the 1992 smash Basic Instinct, which provided one of recent cinema's most iconic moments - opened to utter disinterest nationwide, taking barely a million dollars on its opening night, and just over three million during its entire opening weekend.

Critics were unanimous in their panning of the movie, which features Stone as crime writer and murder suspect, Catherine Tramell, and which cost an estimated $140 million to produce and market - money which Sony now believes it will never see again.

"Of course, there are many contributing factors to a film failing to perform well," a spokesman for Sony said, "and the current US political climate perhaps doesn't lend itself too well to films with an erotic or sexual content.

"That said, as there's nothing we at Sony can really do about that we have instead taken the decision to pin all blame on Sharon and send her to the moon forever."

SOLITUDE

Once on the moon the forty eight year old Stone will spend the remainder of her days in solitude and darkness, rarely if ever able to leave the protection of the cramped lunar lander which will carry her from the shuttle to the moon's surface.  Once Stone has safely touched down on the moon, a remote detonation of the shuttle will be carried out, ensuring there is no way for the actress to escape her exile.

A blanket ban on further trips to the lunar surface is also expected to be put in place for the next fifty years, so as to prevent Stone hijacking or stowing away on any other visiting space transports and returning to Earth.

Although many would consider being banned from setting foot on their native planet a harsh punishment for starring in a commercial box office flop, Stone has accepted Sony's decision, claiming she will take the opportunity to "catch up on a little reading" and contemplate the downward spiral her career has taken in recent years.

Basic Instinct 2 director, Michael Caton-Jones, is not so happy about the arrangements, however, blasting Sony for the move.

"Did Warner Bros send Halle Berry to the moon after Catwoman?  Or John Travolta for Battlefield Earth?" asked the British Born director.  "No, they left them to try to repair their lives in peace, which is what Sony should be doing for Sharon now instead of blasting her off into space, never to see or hear her family again."

Added Caton-Jones:  "Sharon's agent has really let her down.  He should never have agreed to the moon clause in the first place."

Stone - who was reportedly paid $14 million to star in the film - will begin her life of solitude next week, when a specially commissioned space flight will take her to her new home on the distant, dark side of the moon.

Meanwhile, plans for a third installment in the Basic Instinct series are said to have been put on hold for the immediate future.

 
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